Yesterday we took a page from Heather's book and did the last-minute-get-the-hell-out-of-dodge family vacation. I'm blogging this from a beautiful hotel in South Beach, Miami. It's 76 degrees out, the sun is shining, and X and I just returned from a stroll along the pedestrian shopping area of Lincoln Road, where we sat outside for a wonderful lunch of the most divine Italian panini ever. Dave has a business meeting this morning and will be joining us shortly to spend the next couple days resetting ourselves with warm weather, long walks, and room service. He had suggested that we come along on this trip earlier in the week and so we purchased a refundable ticket for me (with X as a lap baby) pending the pediatrician's declaration of health. Yesterday morning the ped gave us his blessing for travel and we were off, not to return to the cold Northeast until Sunday night.
It's a much-needed trip. In addition to spending most of the past three weeks in the house or the hospital (making me more than a little crazy), Dave and I have been on completely different wavelengths. Last weekend my rest and recuperation was accompanied by some very awful arguments that boiled down to a competitive list of who-does-what in life with respect to careers, house, baby, etc. It does nobody any good in a relationship to start keeping score and the argument is ultimately fruitless - the resulting emotions just oscillate between blame and guilt and back again. Although we ended the weekend a little more rested, I think we both were still very resentful and headed into this week without much resolution to the underlying conflict.
So we're here for a change of scenery, some sunshine, and hopefully a reconnection to one another. We don't argue much - in fact out of the past 7 years I can count on one hand the number of arguments we've had - and neither of us are good at it. I think it scares both of us, too, to be out of sync with one another. It's nice to be able to take a deep breath, hold hands, snuggle the little one, and move on.
Sounds like a great trip!
My DH and I have been bickering a lot ever since Karl was born. Being a new parent is really stressful and tiring, so it's no surprise!
We've found one of the keys is to continue to do fun stuff in your everyday life and not just let the chores consume you.
Posted by: Hilde | January 27, 2006 at 11:35 PM
enjoy it - you both deserve it!
Posted by: ann | January 23, 2006 at 10:22 PM
Glad to hear that you are having a good time. It sounds lovely, and like just what the three of you needed. Have a great time!!
Posted by: Heather | January 20, 2006 at 09:20 PM
You've had some pretty major stress in your lives lately, it's understandable that you'd be arguing. This weekend sounds like the perfect solution to your situation. Have a blast!
Posted by: Carole | January 20, 2006 at 06:41 PM
have a wonderful relaxing time..
Posted by: lulu | January 20, 2006 at 04:07 PM
It's completely understandable that you would be arguing - you're both at the end of your ropes with all the changes in your lives. Add to that X being sick and the hospital and I'd be MORE worried if you DIDN'T blow up at each other. Seriously. The problems really come up when you can't recognize why you're arguing and what needs to be done to get things back on track.
G's very jealous, by the way. He says they have people to put suntan lotion on you by the pool. Let us know how that works out. ;-)
Posted by: Cara | January 20, 2006 at 03:13 PM
Have a wonderful time! I am so jealous. I am looking out of my window at a dreary day here in MI. We are expecing 7" of snow tonight!
Posted by: Lisa | January 20, 2006 at 03:12 PM